A collection of my tweets and statuses from 2012

 0) Dhanush to wife: Paathiya d Kolaveri semma hittu. I'm worldwide famous now.
Rajnikanth: Enna ma anga sattham?
Dhanush: Summa pesikitrukaen Maamaaa

1) Two Search phrases Google cant help you with; Sachin Tendulkar Dropped and Rajnikanth's movie flopped

2) Tom Cruise reveals that ongoing India - Australia series will be included in his "Mission Impossible" sequel

3) Pongal Special- Jallikattu in Perth...

4)  Dhoni, be careful, ICC might ban you for slow batting rate as well 

5)  M.S Dhoni logs into FB account. 1 Notification..Sehwag and Dhoni are now friends

6)  A.C = Alternating current; D.C = Direct current; T.N = There's No current

7) What's the similarity between T20 and test? Indian innings

8) Announced retirement in his last match? NO. Team mates carried him? NO. Got any ovation from the crowd? NO. Difference b/w Humans & #WALL

9)School days - Dai mani aaru aayrchu da ezhundru...| Grad Life - Dai Maani aaru ayrchu da, ippoyaach thuungu!!
 
10) If steroids are illegal for athletes, shouldn't Photoshop be illegal for models? 

11) Breaking- Sehwag and Dhoni fight in plane for the window seat 

12) If you have Morkel, you finish it early. If you have Dhoni , you finish it late. If you have Nehra you are finished

13) Match Puttukuchu, Airline paduthukuchu. Time to change owner's name to Vijay 'Kazhutthula' Mallaya 

14) Fastest means of communication: RCB bowlers can write messages on the ball and bowl. It can be sent to the crowd ASAP 

15) CSK, Manasu la enna solludhu?? Jesse Jesse solludha?? Adhan thothuthom ! 

16) Solar energy, tidal energy, Wind energy and now Steyn energy

17) After this cheap performance, Deccan Chargers will now be available in Mercy electronics

18) (Away match for CSK) Deccan can try defeating CSK only today cos remember, in Chennai, Chargers won't work #PowerCut

19)  12 over match aam la. Idhukku edhuku da Eden Garden.. Enga veetu Garden layae aaditu polaamae!!

20) CSK with their usual plan. Allow Mumbai Indians to be at the top of the table but win the IPL.

21) Forget Sehwag or Gayle, Csk fans more concerned about Jayalalitha's 'POWER' play.

22) The queue formed by girls for pani poori at Gangotree convincingly beats the queue formed by guys at petrol bunks. 


23)  Hockey is our National sport..But take it sportively  

24) One more temple run request and I am running to temple 

25) Interviewer to Ravindra Jadeja - Which was your favorite moment in IPL 5 ?  Jadeja: The auction 

26)  If IPL is fixed and you know about it, then here's your check list

• Dada participated in IPL knowing its been fixed
• Entire WC winning Indian team plays IPL because it's fixed and they all love acting
• All the international players play in IPL for a chance in Bollywood
• Simon Taufel loves umpiring fixed matches only
• Commentators and pundits are brainless and you are knowledgeable
• You have no respect for Dravid, Kumble and Tendulkar all these years?
• If you checked right any one of the above criteria, also check if
• You are die hard WWE fan? if not , please consult doctors at

Government Mental Hospital Ayanavaram
No 112, Medavakkam Tank Road, Kilpauk, Chennai - 600010  

 27)  Make use of your last strategic time out discussing which flight is cheaper to your respective homes ( To the opposition that was playing against CSK)

28)  1$= 56 Rupees.; MS aspirants joining this fall please consider your family's downfall

29)  Inii engal News paper, Deccan Chronicle (After Deccan's help for CSK)

30)  Seems Nayanthara takes the role of Vidya Balan in tamil version of dirty picture. Now what will be the movie title?? 'Kevalamaana Padam'

31)  Nehra accepts he never involved in fixing and that he genuinely bowled bad

32) Bhatiya ... Mandaya Potiya!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Bravo's last ball 6)

33)  If a special match b/w DC & PWI is organized after IPL to find out who the REAL loser is, I guess Rain will win.  

34) Air India Pilots should be picked in IPL teams for their excellent Strike Rate

35) Now please don't tell me that 'Ganguly the Movie' is a prequel to Kollywood film named Dhoni

36)  Yo Mahesh usually raps, today he rocked ( 4- 0 -21-2) 

37) 1990's Beggars: Amma Thaaye Picha podungamma

2012 Beggars :
Hit Like/share if u love ur Mom/father/sister.
Hit Like/share if u love God :)
Please like my page

38) I hate it when people asking you to share their short film or Photography is the only time they even talk to you

39) Sorry White and Christian , In Chennai , Color and Religion has never been a problem

40) Only in IPL that if Pune crosses you, then its a good superstition

41)  Lucky to have updated the current city when Current was there.... (Entering Chennai after 1 year)

42)  Soon US Dollar will become Euros. Euros ll become Great Britain pounds. Pounds will become Kuwait Dinar and Indian Rupee ll become Dollars (Murugar)

43) For the next 30 days, no one's gonna care if sun rises or not but Batman should. 

44)  Russia is shining in sports... Football yesterday , Tennis today and Swimsuit edition tomorrow

45)   Meaning of Traffic signal in India

Red- Go If no vehicles come from other 3 sides

Orange -Evanum Madhikka thaeva illa

Green- Go... but vehicles from other 3 sides decide your destination

46) The national bird will soon be changed to Kohli

47) I belong to the group who believed that Neil Armstrong was already dead, even before today.

48) When Siddhu speaks you can hear him even when TV is muted. When Manmohan Singh speaks, you cant hear even in full volume.   

49)  Surya in Maatran ok but this Harris Jayaraj Thirundha Maatran

50)  If you go to Orkut using Internet explorer, you are a Historian

51)  Parents run with their Child for confidence to help them learn Cycling. Usain Bolt can run with his child to make him learn Motor Bikes.  

52)  Murray Gets the Gold. Federer gets Old

53)  Virat Kohli is the Man of the series..Rohit Sharma is the Kohli of the series..Alaeka Amukkungada!!!!  

54)  Newton's Fourth Law: There is a Vadivelu dialogue for every situation in your life.

55)  For every athlete, once in 4 years is representing their country in Olympics. A dream. But for Phelps, its a new venue to collect Gold.   

56) You don't need to fast today to become Anna...~Happy Raksha Bandhan 

57)  Couple during first night ...

Wife: Ennanga Light off pantu vaanga..
Husband: Iru di Current aay cut aaydum ippo

Tamil Nadu Rox!!! 

58)  Simon Taufel to retire from International Umpiring after the on going T 20 world cup. Probably his only wrong decision as an umpire!!

59) Dear posers, Not looking at the camera doesn't mean you are posing naturally...

60) A guy plays cricket almost consistently for 22 years and goes into a lean patch, we say drop him... A guy who gets dropped from team and one fine day comes back to get 4 wickets in just '1 match' .. We say Whatta comeback.. Somethings are just limited to Indian fans

61)  Stuart Broad by name, Stuart Little by nature - Yuvraj Singh

62)  In Cricket there are only 8 teams playing regularly. Then what the F is Super 8?

63)  The 5 symptoms of laziness..1)
  
64)  For International students, it should be called 'Career unfair'

65)  Gals changing display pictures has become like an FB event. Adhuku oru Gumbal koodudhu paaru!! Ayuyuyoo

66)   All Samsung Officials are withdrawing their children from English medium schools because the first thing they were taught was "A for Apple" 

67)  Even though Sachin Tendulkar now has joined Facebook, when he adds a photo to his Facebook profile, it will be called Wall photo.

68)  UV rays can cause cancer but Yuvi rays cure cancer

69)  First Anna library; Then Anna Arch;  Students now eagerly waiting for Anna University   

70)  Everyone has an Asshole friend. If you don't, you are that Asshole

71)  Looking at the trend of scams in India, the future generation  will get confused whether India gate is a scam or a monument

72)  Unless a cyclone is named Tsunami, no one really cares about other names...Nii enna paer vaenalum vei, School irukka Illiya that's all.. 

73)  Each time I goto sleep, I die. Next morning when I wake up, I am reborn, - M.K.Gandhi
Each time I goto sleep, I'm reborn. Next morning when I wake up, I die again - Students 

74)  Cabinet may reshuffle how many ever times, but a pack of cards will always have same number of jokers

75)    Airtel super singer Junior participants ah Music director paada kuupadrangalo iliyo, Director kandippa nadikka koopduvaar!!!#Whattay acting skills

76)  Feel sad for whoever posting, Wow inside Infosys. Wow inside HCL. Wow inside Cognizant.
Its like Kasab posting, wow whatta biryani, inside Jail

77)  MS student's situation
Student: Saar tomorrow is Saraswathi pooja. I cant able to touch book..
Professor: Then submit assignment by e-mail. 

78)  Ten years back came minsara kanavu. Now comes minsaramae kanavu

79)  Kejriwal is trying to expose more than what Sunny Leone has ever done in her entire career!!!

80)  Kareena Kapoor (10 year old) had attended Saif's marriage with Amrita singh in 1991. Kareena congratulated the couple at that time and Saif replied .. "Thank you beta" .. No wonder now Saif has beta version of his marriage!!   
   
81)  Thanks to Vadivelu, Mayira Pochae can now be decently told as Vada Poche!! 

82)  Happy birthday Sachin and Dravid of Indian freedom struggle..
Mahatma Gandhi = Tendulkar. Everyone remembers Oct 2nd as his birthday alone. But it is also the birthday of Dravid named 'Lal Bahadur Shastri' 

83)  Post match press conference..
Ravi Shasthri: Dhoni what's the reason for team's loss?
Dhoni: Pitch Please

84)  Sachin has one more record.. He has played the most number of "This could be his last match/series" matches..

85) DLF gives way to 'Pepsi IPL' ..Time for Archana Vijaya to give way to 'Pepsi Uma'

86)  Kasab hanged. Hurry, post an awesome status and win a 3 year holiday package to replace him in jail !!

87)  Kohli vs Swann would make perfect story line for Aadukalam 2

88)  When someone shouts at you for your mistake, you reply "na otthukren en thappudhan sorry" in order to pacify and end it smoothly.. But wtf moment is when the shouter responds saying "nii enna mairu otthukardhu"

89)  One more song / tune he copies , People will change his name From Harris Jayaraj to Hair is Jayaraj !!

90) Diwali Ku Tv la Enna Padam Paakalaam
Ajith Fan- Mankatha
Vijay Fan- Nanban
Surya fan-Singam
TNEB - Enna ma Anga Sathamm????       

91)  Weekdays used to be long and weekends short. Now time runs so fast that Weekdays are short and weekends are invisible. 



92)  But nothing like TN elections... Same story happens.. Jaya tv, Ndtv and every other news channel would have announced Jayalalitha as CM.. But DMK will still be leading in SUN TV 

93)  If Romney was from Anna University, he would have applied for Re-evaluation..

94)  Halloween is truly celebrated when people start putting their original photos as Display pictures.

95)  Dear GOD. Take Ravi Shastri. Give us back Tony Greig

96)  We don't care if you are Hindus or Muslims. A christmas gift is a gift....- R. Jadeja    
   
97)  Archaeologists reveal that Mayans were die hard Cricket fans and they missed their date only by 2 days. 

98)   Jeppiar colleges should be set up in Delhi!!

99)  BCCI should select 11 painters instead of cricketers if they think about white wash.

100) 12/12/12/ Happens once in a life time..
Bitch please, all the dates happen once in a lifetime only....  

101)  IOC bans Indian Olympic Association..Now Indian athletes cannot participate in future Olympics...

So athletes in need of Gold and Silver medals? Contact

Adyar Sports
044-24416029

Thoughts that immediately went through my mind when Sachin announced his ODI retirement

Sachin Tendulkar... I seriously don't know what his last ODI match was but shall narrate all the memories I have of him... Huge chunk of memory stays during my early child hood till 10 years

1990-2000: The period when I watched cricket only for Sachin. After Azhar, I liked Sachin so much during initial years of watching cricket.. He then became my most favorite cricketer from 1996 world cup onwards. Whenever his stats come on screen, I feel as though it's my stats out there. Used to relate so much to him. Felt so so happy and incredibly scared for him.  Scared to see him facing initial 2-3 overs hoping he doesn't get out and ends up scored big. In general when these bowlers bowled against him, I got scared..

Vs
Srilanka: I dint want him to face Zoysa or Vaas. At times Murali but I know Sachin l take care of spinners those days..
Australia: Mc Grath but not Warne
South Africa: Donald and Pollock
England: Lil scared when Mark Ealham bowls.. Sappa bowler ta out ayda koodadhae nu..Allan Mullaly too.. *just got reminded*
West Indies: Pedro Collins
New Zealand: None
Pakistan: Waqar, Wasim, Saqlain, Aqib and mushtaq ahmed..
Zimbabwe- Henry Olanga and Eddo Brandes.

Sharjah cup just like you all will never get erased from my memory even after my death. I also remember a 53 against New Zealand somewhere when he hits Chris Harris for a six on leg side.. Don't know when where but its stuck in my mind.. Also 41 of 26 balls where he got out to Saqlain Mushtaq.. Lots of centuries too which everyone would be knowing...

Special mention to all matches he has played in Chepauk. I  have never missed even one match except when Anwar scored 194. How many paddle sweeps of Shane Warne came to our stands. Whenever he stands in 3rd man and we shout Sachiiiiiiinnnnnn and he turns back... When he chases the ball towards the boundary, he was so bloody fast that it looked like our stand will fall.

2000-2012: I don't remember much except 2003 world cup.. His Six off Andrew Caddick. Of course all his innings in WC 2003 was gem. 175 against Aus and 200 vs S.Af. Awesome.. Lots lots more..But I wasn't so interested like the 1990's period. Not scared when he faced bowlers. Could be because Indian team had more interesting players like Sehwag. I am sure I remember lots and lots of incidents which I l be able to recollect upon a discussion....

Personally I felt he should have finished after WC 2011. But whatever it is, Salute to the great man.....